It’s A Good Thing I Didn’t Step in it!
In my ongoing search for “job,” I stumbled upon these weird job headlines (most from Craigslist). Some required their descriptors, others required no additives.
Join me in a mouth-gaping, eye-bulging, “are you shitting me?” look at the current state of the job market.
SPECIAL NEEDS ASSISTANT … fits my skill-set perfectly
STOP and get happy! … cannabis consultant?
filing, organizning paperwork … and apparently spelling
the paperwork is off the deepend!
WANTED – SENSORY PANELISTS … we blindfold you then take your nose and mouth hostage
Enlightened Assistant/Social Networking Whiz
Please be completely ethical, punctual, and generous of spirit … work for free?
We work with all kinds of people … WTF?
More WTF?s …
Engaging Conversationalists with a Strong Sense of Humor, Energy
Maintain close relationships with peak customers … customers after 5 p.m.?
Must be willing to work hard, have a great sense of humor and the stamina to be on the phones all day…developing relationships and having FUN! … doesn’t sound like fun
WANTED: AN ENERGETIC AND DETAIL ORIENTED ANIMAL LOVER … have to be when looking for fleas
A Rare Opportunity
If you’re looking for an explosive sales opportunity … or a dynamite one
Seeking Housecleaner with touch of OCD … I kid you not.
We are looking for someone who loves to clean, takes pride in his/her work and knows that it is all in the details.
A GOLDEN OPPORTUNITY IN CUSTOMER SERVICE … need I say more?
Service Ambassador / Greeter … or Rack service ambassador
The ideal Rack service ambassador … I didn’t make it up
responds to emergency situations, including lost children situations.
Maintain an active awareness of safety risks and hazards, communicating to management as appropriate … appropriate is one of those gray area words
PATIENT ASSISTANT … as opposed to an impatient one
CAN YOU DO BOTH? … what? walk and chew gum at the same time?
Seen any weird jobs posted lately?
OMG! Run away fast from just about anything on Craigslist!
OH, Craigslist! How you baffle and amaze me. But really, who wouldn't want a job that promises that I will not meet my husband, have access to a watercooler or, apparently, a paycheck? And here I've been complaining that it's hard to find a good job!
RF: Some scary stuff on Craigslist. However, I've actually found some good job prospects there. Not these jobs. : )
JD: You can't make this stuff up … I mean you can, and I often do. But what you see here in these listings is what you get.
Bwahahaha. "House cleaner with a touch of OCD" ! That's hilarious and certainly does not describe me. What were they thinking?
Loved this post. 🙂
Leeuna: I'd love to see the people who respond to the OCD house cleaning job. They'll probably show up for the interview in a plastic bubble.
I think I might advertize for my sister wife on Craigslist. Just a heads up in case you're interested.
Thanks. What does it pay?
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