Jake is smiling because he’s been eating chopped meat and rice for the past several days. No gauche canned dog food for him.
It all started when he heard a rumor at the dog watering hole.
Barney the Boxer got Jake’s attention with a doggy rope toy and a “pssssst.”
“Hey you, Jake. Come over here,” he said.
Jake nodded and bounded over to a pine tree, with low hanging branches, where Barney was waiting.
“Step into my office.”
Jake followed Barney beneath the branches.
“I’m going to tell you something ’cause I like you. I heard that Spot is eating chopped meat and rice instead of that canned crap.”
Jake’s ears twitched. “Are you pulling my leg?”
“No, I was sniffing your butt, but that’s not important now. I know how you can con your human into giving you packaged red meat.”
“Bullshit!”
“Not exactly, but you’re close. All you gotta do is eat crap. You know, grass, dirt, litter box nuggets, fur.”
“Fur?” Jake barked. “Are you nuts?”
“No, dog. And I’ve got the pedicure papers to prove it.”
“I’m not eating my fur. It’ll make me sick.”
“Precisely!”
“You are crazy. You want me to get sick.”
“It’s only temporary. Your human will take you to see that guy in the white coat.”
“The painter?”
“No, you stupid mutt. The vet. And you’ll get a car trip out of it, too.”
“I don’t know, Barney. It sounds risky.”
“Do want to eat the good stuff or not?”
“Of course, I do. I hate waiting around for a food dropping to hit the floor. And there’s that stupid human 10-second rule. If I don’t get to the food in 9, I’m screwed.”
“So, start eating crap today, and you’ll be dining on rice and hamburger tonight.”
Barney turned, as a Shepherd furball rolled toward the tree.
“I’ve got dibs on this one!” Barney growled.
Later that day, when the vet found fur, grass, dirt, and other indistinguishable matter at the tail end of Jake’s digestive system, Jake started a diet of chopped meat and rice.
Now, all the dogs are doing the con.
What’s the latest gossip at your local dog watering hole?
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The dogs are getting smarter. The cats are worried and have a called a secret meeting for tonight.
Please fill me in on the outcome of the cats secret meeting. LOL!
For a small fee, I can put Barney in a cone collar. Think about it and lemme know.
What would it cost to throw in a muzzle? Barney is such a bad influence. I hate it when fictional characters negatively affect my life.
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I was sniffing your butt, but that’s not important right now. I love it. Reminds me of a line from the old movie “Airplane.” I also love your clarification: this dog’s picture came with the frame. Funny post all around!
I totally borrowed that line from “Airplane.” Thanks. My dog is still eating chopped meat and rice. It has been brought to my attention that he no longer likes the taste of dog food. I got the memo.
Thankfully, our cats won’t eat anything that doesn’t come out of a cat-food pouch, or that they don’t catch and kill themselves. The latter hasn’t happened for quite a while, I’m glad to say.
My cat, too, other than the occasional mouse. The dogs, however, are four-legged vacuum cleaners.
There’s never any food waste with a dog around 😉
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Barney the Boxer’s a trouble maker. Hope he doesn’t live near my neighborhood.
I think there’s a Barney in every town – always sticking his nose somewhere where it shouldn’t be.
Jake is a might handsome guy. It’s just amazing how easy we are to train, isn’t it? I better change my password on my computer. I don’t want Dixie reading this.
Jake and I thank you. Yep (or Yip). I always hide my password from the mutts or they’ll order God knows what from Petco.
You’re so right, Jayne, cats or dogs, they’ve got us right where they want us.
My dogs have me well trained, too.
I’ve been cooking for my dogs for the last 6 or 7 years. It started with the “bad” dog foods being recalled. I cook organic chicken and rice about twice a week and give it to them with their organic “California Naturals” kibble. They really won’t eat anything else now. So many of the commercial “treats” are made in China. I only buy organic and locally made stuff for mine. (Yes, I’m a nutty woman!
That’s what I love about you.
My dogs eat Wellness Simple Solutions dog food, mixed with a grain-free canned food, since Jake has a food allergy.
Jake takes an Omega EFA supplement. When we first adopted him, he barely had any fur on his stomach. Shortly after taking the supplement, the fur started growing in.
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