I’m not a web-tech nerd. Web-tech words, symbols and directions deep fry my brain.
Still, many of us learn web tech stuff simply through osmosis. And learn it I did, this past Monday when I added my blog to Google Analytics.
That took about an hour.
After I added Think Spin to Google Analytics, submitted a site map, using a WordPress plug-in, and then verified I was the site owner, Google performed an integrity check of my blog, which didn’t go well.
Google found several issues, became apoplectic and then was quite rude. It said, “Hey stupid, you have 10,000 problems that must be fixed!”
So, I did what Google told me since it’s usually right about most things.
Though there was that time I ended up on a remote dirt road when using Google maps.
To appease the Google, I dashed over to my dashboard and enacted a plug-in called Wordfence Security, not to be confused with Homeland Security and the color-coded warning system. My warning appeared in the red-letter phrase, “File bad!” or something.
Wordfence informed me that my site had been infiltrated by an evil spam pingback — not a hairy-nosed wombat or pig in the blanket.
But like a hairy-nosed wombat and pig in the blanket, the pingback was bad. So, bad that Google’s web bots couldn’t crawl my site.
Ew! I hate creepy crawly things on my arm or my blog.
Then, Wordfence ordered me to delete the pingback file.
“Wait a minute,” I said. “Why should I trust you?” — since we just had met.
I needed confirmation from another source.
After spending the afternoon searching the vast cyber library of “too much information,” I gave up and did what I should have done hours earlier, called BlueHost, my web hosting company.
During a two-minute conversation, BlueHost guy concurred with Wordfence plug-in.
“Delete it!” he said. “We did a back up this morning should anything go wrong.”
“What could go wrong?” Stupid question.
So, I deleted the evil spam pingback, at which time, Wordfence and Google probably popped open a bottle of champagne and celebrated the neophyte’s success in the complex universe of techno nerd babble.
Oh, and I didn’t get any writing done until now.
What did I learn from this? You may ask. Don’t ever bring back a pingback once it’s fallen in the spam.
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Pingback: Karen Woodham
Can we go back to stone tablets? Life was so much easier, right? Well…..except for all the scary things outside the cave that might eat us.
bwahahahaha!!!!
Cyberspace is very Twilight Zone at times.
Pingback: Lisa
That was one of the plug ins that I installed and quickly disabled. I can’t get my brain around these things any more. I weigh up the actual need of them against my peaceful existence. My peaceful existence wins every time.
I know. This stuff really hurts the brain. I’m going to give peace a chance.
“…a plug-in called Wordfence Security, not to be confused with Homeland Security…”
LOL! I’m glad you clarified that. I had visions of your computer huddled in a chair, bright light shining directly into its monitor while government agents stood around shouting things like “Awright, Qwerty. We know you dropped the packet after receiving the pingback. Where’d ya drop it, huh? Don’t make us reboot you.”
bwahahaha!!! I hate it when a computer reboots and blows its cookies.
My computer would have a CPU breakdown if they tried to waterboard it.
I understand virtually none of this. To me, “Pingback” sounds like some unfortunate incident involving a jockstrap. I’ve only been blogging just over a week, I dread having to deal with something like this.
LOL! Just have fun blogging. Don’t sweat the tech stuff. It will drive you mad.
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