Writers are from Mars and Visit Often


Mars, 2001, with the southern polar ice cap vi...

Mars, 2001, with the southern polar ice cap visible on the bottom. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

During the pubescent Salkin years, I used to think humans were Martian spawns. I don’t know where that idea came from. I guess the same place all weird ideas came from – the sky … and UFOs.

Sometime later during my teenage years, after I got my first typewriter, a thought hit me between the eyes.

You have an imagination and like to write about weird stuff, which makes up an imagination. I sure do like puns.

It was around the same time I realized I was a bit off center of what was expected of a girl my age. I enjoyed staying home in my room and tapping the keys more than hanging out with friends.

I’ve always been an obsessive key tapper, putting my fantastical thoughts on paper, some scary, some funny, some just  weird.

The thoughts always followed me around – from morning to night then through my dreams.

The thoughts are as much a part of me as I am of them. We have always been a family of sorts as well as a one-woman creative team.

I don’t like to brag. But I was born with a movie studio in my head.  At any given moment, my movie studio is working on a project.

When the studio is not in production, my thoughts like to rummage through the “note-to-self” box in the back of my brain and return to the idea about being related to Martians.

Imagine my delight when scientists recently discovered water on Mars.

“Aha,” my thoughts said, and then added another idea to the “note-to-self” box. “You might not be as weird as you thought.”

I don’t know about that …

“You used to enjoy watching ‘My Favorite Martian’ when you were a tot.”

Another coincidence that binds me to the red planet.

“Earth to Lauren. ‘My Favorite Martian,’ Mars, descendant of Martians. You probably got the idea from the TV show.”

But my Martian relatives and I never had an antenna sticking out of our heads. We must have been from a different town in Mars.

“You grew up in the suburbs –”

The suburbs on Mars. That’s why I’ve always loved the color red … like the red planet.

“You used to swim in lakes and pools on earth when you were a kid … like earth children do.”

But I’ve always liked Mars candy bars.

“Like Earth children do.”

So, what are you saying?

“Your antenna is inside your head and it doesn’t get Martian Wi-Fi.”


“Your antenna picks up the ideas that drift in the sky. That’s why you travel to so many places in your head. One of the places might as well be Mars. That’s what happens when imagination follows you around.”

Maybe this is a good time to visit the old neighborhood.

24 Comments Writers are from Mars and Visit Often

  1. Phil

    So that explains it. You’re an alien. I always thought the suburbs were full of them anyway! Some strange beings out there behind those white picket fences.

    1. Lauren

      The suburbs ARE full of aliens. LOL! That really isn’t a white picket fence. It’s a gateway to the Leave It to Beaver Galaxy with black and white solutions to Kodachrome problems.

  2. June O'Hara

    A movie studio in your head, all the time. I’d be exhausted. It’s a gift, but a real pain in the ass, I imagine. I bet a trip to Mars would rejuvenate you.

    Great post, Lauren.

  3. Brenda

    I grew up under the Hollywood sign and never had a chance. I wasn’t aware I was odd until it was called to my attention. Of course, I was crushed and tried in vain for about thirty-seven seconds to blend in, but my weirdness refused to cooperate. You are what your are, Lauren, and in my opinion, all the more enjoyable.

    Off the record, I had a habit of rehearsing my Academy Awards acceptance speech for best screenplay from about seven or eight. Mental I was, oh, and am.

      1. Brenda

        I hate having to confess this, but I’ve ‘interviewed’ her on my blog. All a figment of my imagination, of course, but it goes to show how far we go for our dreams.

  4. Rum Punch Drunk

    Ah, so that explains it all Lauren you ” was born with a movie studio in your head?”. And you said “my Martian relatives and I never had an antenna sticking our of our heads”. This is where I really need to come in as your fellow blogging mate, read this slowly:

    Now the next time you decide to go on one of your special visits to Mars, make sure you have a little word with my doctor. He is really good. He can give you tips on how to get there (hospital directions) or he might even suggest you get a chauffeured cab (ambulance) or he might give you a little painless needle in the arm just to make sure you keep calm on your way to Mars πŸ™‚

    Be sure to let me know when “your antenna picks up the ideas that drift in the sky”.
    Ha, ha ha ha. I just couldn’t’ resist this comment.

  5. ReformingGeek

    Evil Twin is excited to hear you are from Mars. I caught her outside last night doing something with flashing lights. She said she was trying to signal you up on Mars. She wanted to know what movie was playing.

    Sigh. It’s like talking to a cat.

  6. Karen Woodham

    Imagination is a wonderful and powerful thing, what else could safely take us to far away planets, face moments of fear and try out new things all from our armchairs or in your case from your comfy chair and with paper and pen in hand πŸ˜‰

  7. Atul

    While reading the article, I stopped at word typewriter and it reminded me old computing days when there were typewriters in market and with that thought, my mind brought the snuggling voice of these type-machines.

    On the other side, I doubt if you are from Earth or an alien from Mars who have come to research on human beings of planet earth πŸ™‚

    1. Lauren

      Thank you!!! There’s nothing like the sound of a typewriter clacking those keys.

      I don’t know what’s wrong with CommenLuv. I’ll have to look into it. Thanks for bringing it to my attention.

      1. Atul

        Ya.. u sud check the commentluv plugin..

        Commentluv gives me below error

        “It appears that you are offline or another error occured contacting the API url, have you set it to use www or missed the www off the api url?? check the technical settings and add or remove www from the api url.”

        I can see its working only for your blog.. May be you need to update the plugin or you can contact the CommentLuv Team (Andy Bailey).

        1. Lauren

          I posted my problem at the CommentLuv forum. I don’t know how to find the API url. I’m mostly clueless when it comes to web tech problems.

  8. meleah rebeccah

    “I don’t like to brag. But I was born with a movie studio in my head. At any given moment, my movie studio is working on a project.”

    Man, I’m jealous! That must be fun! I wish my imagination was half as entertaining as yours!


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