Image by Getty Images via @daylife -A long distance phone call off a short Nigerian pier- VIVIAN Hello Friend. Please excuse my English. I learned it from watching reality TV. How are you doing today including your work, I hope all is well with you. FRIEND I’m fine. but my work is not. Maybe you… Continue reading
Odd Facts and Observations about Dogs
– TWO DOGS. ONE STORY – Jenny Jake Jake is from West Virginia and enjoys hunting and air sex. Jenny is from Puerto Rico and enjoys opening latches on fences and is also an illegal immigrant. I wonder if there is a connection. Jake is not a rocket scientist. Please refer to the above photo… Continue reading
Guest Post on 2012 DVD at Blazing Minds – The Actors Look Smaller on TV!
Image by joanna8555 via Flickr While watching the movie 2012 on DVD, I had time to compile a marketing list, as well as to ponder the weak plot points – the movie goes on a bit (2 hrs, 38 min). So, I decided to write a review. It’s not an ordinary review because my mind… Continue reading
WTF Did the Cashier Say Now?
Image by sgroi via Flickr The female cashier at the Stop and Shop had a voice like Bea Arthur and a body like Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. I got a nosebleed just looking up at her. While I tossed items from the cart onto the conveyor belt, I listened to Cara Cashier ring them up. “Sorry about… Continue reading
Oddjobs Part Deux – Shaken not Stirred
It’s A Good Thing I Didn’t Step in it! In my ongoing search for “job,” I stumbled upon these weird job headlines (most from Craigslist). Some required their descriptors, others required no additives. Join me in a mouth-gaping, eye-bulging, “are you shitting me?” look at the current state of the job market. SPECIAL NEEDS ASSISTANT… Continue reading
Easily Distracted by Bright Shiny Objects.
Thoughts bounce around my head like pinballs in an arcade machine. I often get lost in time. At a glance, it’s 9 a.m. Then, it’s 9:20. Where did the time go? Don’t know. But I really could have used those twenty-minutes. Bada-Bing. Bada-Boom. I’m back in real time or stationary chair-butt time, sitting in… Continue reading
Hot and Bothered in an Un-Air-Conditioned Way.
Target Practice. Image via Wikipedia It’s 99 degrees outside and 88 degrees inside because the AC is DOA. So, I called an air conditioning repairman, the cool kid who gets high on Freon and chilled air, not the uncool kid, like me, who thinks that refrigerant is a really tiny refrigerator. Hell. I don’t even… Continue reading
Fan Fiction. When Osci Meets Blowy.
Image altered by me via Wikipedia BLOWYI feel stuck. Image via Wikipedia OSCII can see why. You’re always planted in the same spot. BLOWYIt sucks. OSCIThat’s a fan of a different breed. BLOWY No. Being me sucks, all stationary like, staring at the same damn wall day after day. OSCI Not me. I… Continue reading
My Lawn is a Toilet.
ODE TO DOGGIE EXCREMENT My mutts pee on the lawn killing the grass, er, weeds that proliferate amid all things green, now a paler shade of yellow-green, slipping between the cracks on the brick pathway and inner circles, er, holes of the garden. Walking the lawn is dangerous to shoe-sole survivors of Doghau concentration camp… Continue reading
Formalda Hyde: The Lady with a Killer Instinct.
Please welcome Guest Blogger Formalda Hyde. She will do a series of posts on her stories of heartbreak and heart attacks. She has that affect on men. In her own words… The last man who bought me dinner dropped dead at the table. Before I had a chance to finish my Chardonnay, the paramedics arrived,… Continue reading